Midnight Thoughts

Does Middle Ground Exist?

We all see “world views” as BLACK or WHITE with no in between. And the problem is it is only black or white with NO in between. You can make an effort to see someone’s view on a sensitive topic and you may understand it but there is no middle ground to many of them. There is no solution that will make everyone happy.

For example abortion: I see the side that says it’s my body and it’s my choice and I get it because a female body goes through A LOT in 9 months of pregnancy. (Not every woman’s pregnancy body is the same but generally) EVERYTHING gets bigger from feet to hands and stomach and even faces. Appetites change and lifestyles can’t be maintained whether they’re “athletic” or “lazy”. You have to stop drinking, smoking, and everything you eat is now for 2 so you have to make sure to get extra essentials like vitamins and protein. Women often experience calcium depletion, causing bones and teeth to be weaker. They experience extreme levels of fatigue, nausea, and then “cramps” from hell at the end of it. It’s basically our worst nightmare period amplified by 50. So YES, part of me is SCREAMING it is your body your choice. But for the pro-lifers all the above that ARE your choice to prevent are prevented prior to conception because all the rights to do what you want to your body (including tattoos, piercings, starving, binge eating or drinking, exercising, laying on a couch, birth control, and even sex) are rights taken away from a human that doesn’t even have a voice yet when the fetus is aborted. The belief that life ends when the heart beat stops is widely excepted. Trained individuals are taught to check for pulse and breathing as signs of life, and heck even Hollywood teaches everyone they need to check for a pulse! There will be no pulse if there is no heart beat, so why is a life NOT considered a life when it has a heart beat?  In a car accident where an expectant mother dies (and so does the fetus) it is considered a double homicide, if that fetus is not a life, why is it a double homicide? A pregnancy test can detect a child as early as 2 weeks, and a fetus’ heartbeat can be detected as early as 3 weeks. By heart beat standards it’s a life and a voiceless one at that, and pro-lifers believe it is there job to give voice to the voiceless while pro-choicers claim the same. The women who do not have a voice in an abusive relationship or in a restrictive country. Yes there are women who are unable to obtain forms of birth control (other than abstinence, and sometimes even that is a form that is unattainable. I.e. Rape). Though it’s arguable that there are ways out of a restrictive country or abusive relationship, and I can hear it now “yeah if they die!” But there actually are women who escape those highly restrictive situations alive and not only survive but learn to thrive. But if these women in incredibly restrictive situations had access to abortions, do you think it would keep their tormentors from killing them if/when they learned about it?

And reality is we will never know who is right until we die and meet our maker– that is assuming that you believe in one, though all religions believe that everyone will face theirs. One way or another though, I do believe we will get our answer and I can honestly say I am concerned about being on the wrong side. Not to say I think I am wrong-just that I would hate to think I defended the wrong side, that I fought the “good fight” against the side that had the right idea. See it’s black OR white.

Here’s where it gets a little grey.

I have never seen a mother who would not give everything, even her life, for her child. Now I know I have a skewed view, that of an idealistic world where all babies are wanted and have happy, healthy, well off homes. I know there is evil in the world that even if every mother kept every single child she ever bore, some people are hateful and would take out anger on the children they did not want which would be incredibly harmful to a person–a child. To know they weren’t wanted, weren’t loved, and were the source of their parents unhappiness. The emotional instability COULD only cause more problems, though some people are able to rise above all of it and come out stronger and amazing parents to their own children.

Now on the flip side imagining that every unwanted pregnancy was born healthy and adopted (or placed in a foster system that worked without hiccup with only dedicated families) and knew they were wanted. There would still be some children who were hurt by the system because we cannot control how someone feels. A child WANTED by a family could love their life and embrace everything knowing that their birth parents gave them to their best chance, their best life. But there will still be the children who focus on the “gave”. They know their adoptive parents love them and want them but they can’t help but shake the pain of why didn’t the original set do the same.  Isn’t it still important to give the chance for the person to make that decision on their own?

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